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Sexual Addictions

Sexual addictions have destroyed my life and my children's lives in many ways.  This issue continues to pull at my heart.  We live in a world that is filled with sex.  Everywhere we turn we see it.  Magazines, television, pornography, movies, internet, social media and billboards all show it.  Our children are growing up in a society where sexual addictions are becoming more and more common.  There is a need in this society for sex.  It sickens me to think about this matter as I have watched the devastation that this causes in life.  Yet, this is the society that we live in today.  As I have thought about it I can't help but think about how we as Christians can protect ourselves and how we can change.  Is it possible to heal from sexual addictions?  This question plagues me as I think about sex trafficking, sex offenders and pedophiles.  It sickens me.  What I have watched is a huge progression in this issue in our society and it frightens me.  Today I want to speak to this issue and what I see.  Many things lead to this addiction and I won't go into all of those things.  What I want to go into are ways to protect ourselves as Christians and what I see this disease causing in people's lives.  The biggest issue I see in pornography and sexual addictions is pride, arrogance and control issues.  These people have to control others and other things as they delve deeper and deeper into the world of addiction.  But there is also a secrecy to their addictions.  It is done in private and often hidden from others.  This leads to lying, manipulation and trying to cover up their actions.  But the heart of the issue is what concerns me most.  Arrogance and pride are what concern me most about this issue.  I have watched these people become self-absorbed, self-consumed, and self-gratifying as they feed themselves with their fleshly desires. But there is a root to these issues and I think these things need to be addressed.  What drives a person to these addictions are hurts from life:  rejection, not feeling good enough, low self-worth, abuse, insecurities . . .  The list goes on and on.  These issues must be addressed as well.

What comes to me as I think about this concept is the concept of temperance.  I was raised in an environment where people often talked about temperance.  It isn't a word we hear much about anymore but it is so important for Christians to begin to think about it again.  When I think of temperance my mind is diverted to the three monkeys of my childhood days.  One with their hands on their eyes, the other with their hands on their mouths and the other with their hands on their ears.  

In my mind temperance isn't just what we eat, it is how we live.  It is what we choose to partake in.  We must guard our eyes and our ears from the stimulus that comes into them.  What we fuel our eyes and ears with will eventually take over our hearts.  If we are continually looking at and listening to worldly things these are the things that will pour out of our hearts.  We cannot be healthy spiritually if we do not filter out the garbage in our lives. The phrase for computer programming is garbage in, garbage out.  It is the same thing for us.  If we continue to watch pornography, movies with sexuality, cussing, violence or listen to music with these same kinds of lyrics, or if we are surrounded by these evils, it impacts us deeply.  The garbage that goes into us will come out of us.  We can't live God-fearing, Christ-centered lives if we are allowing these evil things to enter us.  The Bible says in Proverbs 4:23, "Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life."  

God calls us to be like Him, and take on His likeness.  This happens when we spend time with Him, when we beg Him to help us desire Him, when we step away from worldly influences, when we fill our minds with Godly things.  The more time we spend with God, the more we surround ourselves with Christ-centered things, the more we can be changed internally.  He makes us new and recreates and rewires us.

Daily we are in a spiritual war zone.  Our choice is this, will we choose the world or God? The only way to free ourselves from our addictions is by establishing a personal relationship with God and daily spending time with Him in prayer and Bible reading.  Then our next step is to cut all our ungodly ties.  If pornography is an issue then we must step away from the things that draw us in:  social media, technology, television, ludicrous places, movies, music, etc.  We must avoid these things and deepen our relationship with God and develop an accountability team.  

Our hope and power for improvement and change can only happen when we humble ourselves before God and seek His power and strength for change.  This is the only solution to our addictions.  As I think about this ever-growing issue my heart breaks.  All I can do is direct people to God and pray for people with addictions.  There is hope and a solution only if we will humble ourselves before God, surrender every area of our lives to Him, spend time with God daily and develop an attitude of complete temperance in all areas of our life.  Lord, my prayer today is that those struggling with this issues will humble themselves, confess their faults to you and to others that they have hurt and begin a life of temperance.  Heavenly Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, will you break the chains of Satan that continue to trap these people in this unhealthy pattern of addiction.  May you prove that there is power in the name of Jesus Christ.  Bring deep healing and restoration in these people's lives.  Amen.

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